Memphis May Fire

Staring at the wall,
I never thought this would be so hard.
How could have I been so close and never known you?
I never knew, I never knew you at all!
You will always be my father but I hope you know,
It's your fault and I'll never know what that means.
You left a void that never could be replaced.
I am dying inside but you will never see!
I always had hoped that you did not want it this way,
But no matter how hard I try you always pushed away.
You said you loved me but...
How was I supposed to know
(How was I supposed to know)
When you left here,
You left me here alone?
Do I ever even cross your mind,
Just for second?
Do you know I'm alive?
You know I would let you in but you threw everything away.
So tell me what did you get from all of these years of pain?