Eminem

[Verse 1]
Pick up the god dang phone...
Bitch where the fuck were you Tuesday?
With who you say?
I wasn't at the studio
Bitch what'd you do screw Dre?
You went there looking for me
Oo that excuse is too lame
Keep playing me you're gonna end up with a huge goose egg
You fake, lying slut you never told me you knew drake
Que Lupe? You want to lose two legs
You try to flip this on me?
If I spent more time with you, you say
“Ok yeeah, I’m coo-coo, hey?” Well, screw you
And I’d be the third person who screwed you today
Oh, four? Dre, Drake, Lupe? Oh touche
You were too two-faced for me
Thought you was my number one
True BlueAce but you ain't
And I can see you and you make
That little boo-boo face
Cause I'm hanging up this phone, boo
You make my fucking Blutooth ache
You feeling blue too late
Go smurf yourself you make me wanna smurfin' puke blue Kool Aid
Here's what you say to someone you hate
[Hook]
My life will be so much better if you dropped dead (dead)
I was laying in bed last night thinking
And this thought just popped in my head and I thought
Wouldn't shit just be a lot easier if you dropped dead (dead)
I would feel so (so) much (much) better x3
[Verse 2]
Think I just relapsed, this bitch pushed me over the brink
Hop on the freeway trying to get some time alone and just think
Then the cops pulled me over but they let me go
Cause I told ‘em I’m only driving drunk cause that bitch drove me to drink
I'm back on my fuck ho's
But a whole new hatred for blondes, but bias? I hate all bitches the same, baby come on
Excuse the pun but bitch you're such a broad statement
And I am channeling my anger through every single station it's on
Cause a woman broke my he-art, I say he-art cause you ripped it in two pa-arts
And threw it in the garbage, who do you think you are?
Bitch guess it's time for me to get the dust off
And pick myself up off the carpet
But I'll never say the L-word again
I la-la-la-la lesbian *shout*
I hope you hear this song and go into a cardiac arrest
My life would be so much better if you just
[Hook]
My life will be so much better if you dropped dead (dead)
I was laying in bed last night thinking
And this thought just popped in my head and I thought
Wouldn't shit just be a lot easier if you dropped dead (dead)
I would feel so (so) much (much) better x3
[Bridge]
Cuz you told me, you love me, forever
Bitch, that was a lie
Now I never, wanted someone, to die
So bad in my fucking life but fuck it there’s other fish in the sea
And I'mma have a whale of a time
Being a single sailor for the night
Bitch on a scale of 1 to 10, shit
I must be the holy grailer
Catch this ho I got an Oscar attached to my fucking name (great)
I might hit the club on a chica's tail, uh
Made for me say fuck it kick some shots back and hammer the nailer
These bitches tryna get atached with the failer
And latch him to the tail of my bumper to scratch them with the back of my trailer
Like I'm itchin' to get hitched
Yeah I'm rich as a bitch but bitches ain't shit
I'd rather leave a bitch in a ditch
Bitch you complain when you listen to this
But you still throw yourself at me
That's what I call pitchin' a bitch
That's why I'm swinging at this chicks on sight
Long as I got a bat and two balls it's foul
But my dick's on strike so all that love shit is null and void
Bitch I'm a droid, I void cupid stupid wasn't for blowjobs you'd be unemployed
Oi oi oi man oh man you boy boy boys
Getting sick at these girls girls girls
Oink oink oink you fucking pigs
All you good boys doink doink doink
I got 99 problems and the bitch ain't one
She's all 99 of them I need a machine gun
I take em all out I hope you hear this song
And grow into a cardiac arrest have a heart attack
And just drop dead and I'mma throw a fucking party after this cause
[Hook]
My life will be so much better if you dropped dead (dead)
I was laying in bed last night thinking
And this thought just popped in my head and I thought
Wouldn't shit just be a lot easier if you dropped dead (dead)
I would feel so (so) much (much) better x3
[Outro]
I'm just playing bitch, you know I love you