Say Anything

[Verse 1]
If I die and go to hell real soon
It will appear to me as this room
And for eternity I'd lay in bed
In my boxers, half stoned
With the pillow under my head
[Verse 2]
I'd be chatting on the interweb
Maggots pray upon the living dead
I had no interest in the things she said
On the phone every day
I'll permanently hit the hay, hey
[Chorus]
I called her on the phone and she touched herself
She touched herself. She touched herself
I called her on the phone and she touched herself
I laughed myself to sleep
[Verse 3]
At this rate
I'll be heading for electric chairs
I'm only human with my cross to bear
When she described her underwear
I forgot all the rules my rabbi taught me in the old shul